New Year’s Day bathtub philosophizing

Having followed the news, watched Mai Zetterling’s Girls, Girls, Girls from 1968, and experienced my own, and friends’, stories, I suddenly came to a postmodern perspective on the genus issue (particularly as a parent).

It seems girls/women would benefit from prioritising the development of wisdom, and boys/men the development of active kindness. Things tend to turn out well when such is the nature of our coexistence.

I don’t mean to say that the reverse isn’t also true – of course men need wisdom and women need active kindness – but in terms of priorities, and if I have to pick one quality for each that generally would, and do, make the world a better place, I would say that wise women and kind men make for a nice place to inhabit.

Women sometimes overdo the nurture thing, at the expense of good judgement. Men sometimes handle that y-chromosome (and the extra testosterone) with less grace than desired.

Although the official agenda certainly confirms no such things, there seem to be tendencies floating around, particularly visible in playground culture, that discourage wisdom in women, and kindness in men. Girls are encouraged to act dafter than necessary, if you look at images and accessories to life in popular culture. Boys are encouraged to hide their kindness, so as to not appear ‘weak’.

This is extraordinarily silly. Are daft women more attractive? Are unkind or ‘tough’ men more manly? Personally I find both tiring, at best.

I find kindness a very attractive quality in a man – courtesy, consideration, empathy, insight. Bring it on. I really do not see how that can be anything but attractive. Likewise, the choice between spending time with a daft woman, or an insightful, thoughtful woman with good perspective on life, is very easy indeed.


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